I Restrict By Accident.

Yes, I know what you’re saying.  You might think that it’s impossible.  It’s just that up until now, I had only eaten a 120-calorie yogurt.  That was eaten at 9:30 this morning.  I ate a couple of hours ago because I felt like I was preoccupied.  So, I feel like I restrict.

The sad part is that I like to do that.  I like to forget and I love to have salads.  All the time.  Sometimes, I fill those gaps with coffee.  Sometimes, with tea.  But that’s something I love to do…

Is that bad?

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The Nurse Lied to Me + More.

How is it that it’s perfectly alright to lie to a patient…?

I may have been suffering from a delusion, but the nurse that prescribed me medicine lied to me…  She said I had borderline personality disorder, and, to be quite frank, she deleted it from my chart.  She placed the delusion in my head, and that, in turn, made me believe that.  Truth be told, I don’t trust her anymore.

In other news, there’s this coworker that I have a huge crush on. Let’s call him A.  I met A in December, and he was very quiet and nice, but then he started to joke around and open up.  We haven’t really talked because, let’s face it, I’m awkward as hell and he’s poised.  Still, I really wish that I could talk to A.  Haha….

He’s not gonna like me and it’s not going to happen.  Well, I gotta get ready to work 6 hours.  Let’s hope he’s there, because eye candy makes the time go by faster.

Thoughts Dump

I’ve noticed something. My weight has gone down by 3 pounds. (Yes, I weighed myself just now.) I’ve been eating healthy foods for about 4 days, and I’ve completely cut out fast food and junk food for about a week.

At around the same time, I have decreased my Risperdal, and the result of that is weight loss.  So, I’m not sure if this is the Risperdal or my healthy eating venture.  Regardless, I’m happy with the results, and I can’t wait to lose some weight!

In other news, my boyfriend is the sweetest thing in the whole wide world.  He’s counting down the hours until we see each other again. I can’t really post 3 weeks from now because I’m going to be getting a volunteer position, and then that weekend, I’m gonna be seeing him.  And I want to tell him I love him. Still, it’s hard for me to express my emotions aloud, and people will overhear. I suppose that I’ll wait to tell him until later this year.

I have reason to believe that I might be a demiboy.  The only thing is that I like girl’s clothing.  I would love to wear dresses and skirts, but I feel like I’m a guy. It’s not that strong of a feeling, with means I’m not transgender.  It’s halfway to transgender. I don’t get sad about my female anatomy, I’m just alright with having a body.  It’s hard to explain.