I’ve been subconsciously suicidal all day. I only realized it now because I feel sad and empty. I binged all day to raise my blood sugar up so that I might die. Even now, I want to drink soda and eat an entire container of cookies because I don’t want to live anymore. The abilify isn’t helping anymore.
I’m tired, and I’m hurting. And I’m snapping. I can feel it. I want to slit my wrists open and make everything stop, if only for a little while. I belong in a mental hospital right now.
I haven’t gone to a mental hospital yet, but damn, I need to go. I swear, I’ve never found such a desire to commit suicide more in my life than ever. The only reason I can’t do it is because of my boyfriend. He’s in love with me, and… It’d kill him if I did it. He’s the only thing holding me together. And if he dies…
Someone help me. I need help.
Fusion: 
See your doctor/psychiatrist asap
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There’s no earlier appointments.
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Then your nearest ER right now. You’re suicidal, therefore they have to treat you.
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That would involve telling someone to drive me somewhere, and they would freak out instead of help me. I don’t know what to do.
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Taxi, or just call someone.
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If you can’t, please get hold of these guys Phone: 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
Website: http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org
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I’m really impressed that you thought of using a tw, that was incredibly considerate when you’re feeling so awful xx
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You are so loved. I know you don’t feel it but if I was there I would hold you and jump into a taxi with you to the nearest ER. Think. Is there someone who will come and take you? Can your boyfriend help?
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Honestly Kayden – getting help is such a relief. You think of it as negative but it takes strength not to run from this. Please get help now.
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Can you please reply? I am worried about you!
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