Let me explain.

So, there was a small update, and I wanted to post more, but I was tired.  After spending loads of time with my boyfriend this weekend and working yesterday, I fell asleep shortly after I posted the update.  So let me explain.

The Risperidone I’m taking twice a day is keeping my hallucinations away.  Sometimes, I hear things, but it’s the normal version of “I’m just hearing things.”  My last hallucination was about a couple of weeks ago, and I’m happy to report that my moods are under control.  I still feel things deeper and obsess over things that have happened that affect me.   Since my decreased of Risperidone, I’ve lost 5 pounds/maybe 6 pounds.

As for work, I can work about 19 hours without any repercussions. My mental health is fine except for a person that no one likes at work.  I can manage.  I do a lot of things at work and I have to say, I’ve been doing a really good job. I’ve gotten my first compliment, something that is rare in the fast food industry, and it’s made me raise my head higher.

My boyfriend and I are going strong, and I have to say, I told him I loved him through my other blog.  He read a post, and he said that he loved me this weekend.  He’s a really good guy.  He tells me everything that he’s thinking and we can sit and talk all day. We’re just really, really lucky to be in love. We celebrated 4(or was it 5? I’m bad at counting) months together.

I’m growing stronger in my faith, and I think that helps me mentally.  It also helped me to say that I don’t care what other people think of me, as long as I’m doing the right thing.  It’s hard to say that when you’ve depended on people’s opinions in your life, but I’m confident that I can get to that mindframe right now.

I read this letter that my past self wrote about a year back, and he told me to stop cutting.  It didn’t say why or how, but it just said to stop cutting.  So, that’s what I plan on doing.  From this day on, I’m going to try to stop cutting.  Well, I’m going to stop self-harming, too: mentally, physically, emotionally…. I’m going to stop.

That’s about all I really have to talk about.


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