Grieving and Cyberbullying.

So, I should get this off of my chest.  Someone I knew died today.  It hurts me because he was a loving and caring person and he had the whole world ahead of him.  He was only 21.

If I were off of my medication, I would say that it’s my fault, that I should’ve helped him, even though he was states away.  I’d be crying all day, and it would’ve hurt me.  I barely knew the guy, but I would internalize my sadness and become extremely depressed.  But I still feel sad, and I think that the abilify has helped me so much with my depression; I don’t feel sad enough to really cry, but I’m grieving in a way that’s appropriate for this situation.  I barely knew him = not crying, but sad.

In other news, I have a person that created a twitter just to harass me.  I feel so flattered, you don’t even know.  I was wondering when I’d get one of those trolls.  Now that I got one, I feel like I won an Oscar.  I’m officially an important blog and I don’t care if he said I diagnosed myself.

So, to the person who tried to bully me: I have documentation to prove my theory of being schizoaffective, you imbecile.  I mean, you should also know that everyone is different when it comes to medication.  Therefore, you should stop trying to make it look like I’m claiming to be condescending.  Oh, and by the way, my posts are all over the place because I’m disorganized.  That’s what schizophrenia does to you.  You probably didn’t know that, you little shit.  You’re not bothering me.  You’re just amusing to me.  You amuse me with some stupidity.  So, with that in mind, have a nice day.

As to the people that support me: You guys are like a family to me.  You were there where no one else would listen to me, and you were there when I started to see and hear things.  You were there through all of the meds and diagnoses.  I really love you all, and if I was ever rude to you during those times, I am totally sorry.  I was under so much stress and delusions…

Anyways, that’s it for this post.

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16 thoughts on “Grieving and Cyberbullying.

    • The first comment made me chuckle. But yeah, I feel like I’m winning.
      He was a very good man. If you could, would you pray for his family and girlfriend? They’re really torn up.
      Also, I apologize for some of my behavior. Like I said, I was just out of it and slightly paranoid of people.

      Liked by 1 person

  1. On Cyber Bullies: I really want to say to you something like “don’t worry I’ll break him submissive and take him down, kick his arse for you. But what I can say is that I’ve been doing some thinking on trolls on and offline. They have short attention spans, and probably forget about us “victims” in an instant – or what they have done or have said. (yes I am a victim of bullying) They probably spend all day loving the sound of their own voice more than anything in the entire unfathomably huge Universe. Idiots.

    Like

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